happenings

happy happy new year

2012-01-03T14:52:00.000+01:00

2012 is here.

It has changed us

yet we don´t know how.

How are You?

I´m sorry for not being around.

exhibition

2011-09-20T10:21:00.001+02:00

Textile Art from Skåne.
Exhibition in Rättvik, Dalarna, Sweden.
The opening went well! My colleagues are gorgeous and everyone who attended seemed genuinely interested in our work. It was a happy-happening!

progress XIII

2011-09-15T12:47:00.001+02:00

Exhibition coming up! Opening on Saturday in Rättvik in Sweden. Me and four collegues, I'll show You pics later.
This piece that's been in progress is now to be shown. I'm on the train up North to take part of the happening!

progress XII

2011-08-30T17:11:00.001+02:00

detail.

progress XI

2011-08-30T17:09:00.001+02:00

detail.
Cut out from an old book about the Earth.

progress X

2011-08-30T17:06:00.001+02:00

Under construction.
During Time and Timelessness.

progress IX

2011-08-30T17:03:00.001+02:00

detail

progress VIII

2011-08-30T17:02:00.001+02:00

I pray, Earth please stay.

progress VII

2011-08-30T16:58:00.001+02:00

detail

cooperation

2011-08-21T09:05:00.001+02:00

gooseberries, pumpkin, broccoli, apple-mint together in one tiny spot. A veggie hug?

metamorphosis

2011-08-14T22:07:00.003+02:00

Happy harvest
in a small scale
and magnificent
yellow and green

metamorphosis
from seed
to food.

Ariane, I'm thinking of You.

metamorphosis
I'm saying Your name
Your name is in my voice.

two

2011-07-30T20:30:00.001+02:00

The rainbows were following us like two cats when you go for a walk.

water

2011-07-21T23:08:00.001+02:00

Rain drops in bloom.

Thank You
for the little that is mine
it is not little
it is all I have
it is all
then it is much.

yellow happiness

2011-06-15T18:46:00.001+02:00

Happiness is often yellow I think.

This piece of happiness is growing in our tiny pedagogical garden.

I miss You my dear blogfriends I'm not so outspoken these days. But all well and knotting my thoughts in the right direction. I'm still trying to figure out how and why to gather my mind and my wish for expression. Maybe I can find the answer in between the question and the answer. My experience though is that that spot is incredibly huge, I don't know where to start.
Our computer is also really slow nowadays so it's hard for me to catch up with You and comment. You are still in my sphere.

We have summer days here, me and the kids are hanging around and enjoying our selves!

Love xx

pink poppy

2011-06-08T14:05:00.001+02:00

I'm looking for the organic road
I'm searching for patterns to show me the way
I'm walking that way
it's a pattern
an organic show
I'm looking

kite

2011-06-05T13:32:00.001+02:00

I wish
this was our every day life.

orange

2011-06-03T21:33:00.001+02:00

Poppy at sunset.

yellow and grey

2011-05-22T18:46:00.001+02:00

When the sun isn't able to shine the ground takes its place for a while. At least here in these yellow fields under the grey sky.

progress VI

2011-05-18T10:21:00.002+02:00

My symbol of spirit in this Rebirth piece is in place. Three prints with yellow pink and blue.

dream

2011-05-14T18:12:00.003+02:00

Todays drawing challenge is dream at clever Nadine's
I didn't draw,
but I dream...

about silence.
the sounds of silence

the only noice allowed / aloud in my dream are sounds of Nature
like childrens voices and whispers of wind.

progress V

2011-05-14T10:40:00.001+02:00

The grey part is in place. Here symbol for ashes.
and the bird starts to appear...
Rebirth.

It/She/He/You/Me

progress IV

2011-05-14T10:32:00.001+02:00

Started the printing process, yay!

progress III

2011-05-14T10:30:00.001+02:00

The smaller sketch.

progress II

2011-05-14T10:28:00.002+02:00

In Malmö at KKV-textil prepared for screen printing on fabric. This piece is going to be almost four meters. All ready...

progress I

2011-05-14T10:25:00.003+02:00

My boy helping me out in the studio. Huge sketch is finished and awaiting next step, remember this bird?. Next step will be taken in Malmö at KKV.
Coming up...

just a minute

2011-05-05T11:18:00.000+02:00

So many things has been happening

yet I´m in the same place

surrounding myself with the same surrounding.

a chrysalis

a cycle

a minute

a lifetime

a minute

I take

a minute

in to

a chrysalis

decades

later

liberates

the cycle
of
a lifetime
the minute
pupates

tiny wings

arise

the minute

releases

is gone

within

a minute.

the tree

2011-04-18T18:38:00.001+02:00

sleeping in a tree.
I listen to them play,
the boy says:
this is life.

detta är livet.

in the hand of

2011-04-18T14:04:00.001+02:00

a part of a sketch
a part of me

translation map

2011-04-18T11:09:00.001+02:00

Here are the english words for the first pic in the post map, two steps below. I hope You can manage to decipher it.

kär lek

2011-04-17T11:09:00.001+02:00

An update for love
Kärlek - Love
The swedish word kärlek is made of the two words kär and lek.
kär - in love
lek - play.
Now go and play in love!

map

2011-04-17T10:01:00.000+02:00

This weeks host of drawing challenge is perfect Hi Happy Panda with map. If You haven´t been visiting Rachel - GO THERE! She shows a wonderful view of Life on her blog.

Now for the map, I´m showing some old work that is still in progress. It´s old as in I started it eleven years ago and Old as in the deepth of knowledge that comes from it, as it comes to me from Timelessness. They are sort of maps or compasses. I often do metaphysical maps. I don´t really know yet how to talk about it/them. And I´m quite brave to show this work... I have rarely shown it for a decade. They are here as well.
The third pic is a map of colour nuances. I save my mixtures in a cover. I am strictly bound to some of the nuances that my inner maps show me. So I really need to know how I got there, at least practically in the mixture process. Because there is no way (yet) for me to theoretically describe or lead the way in or out of my maps, or is there?

I´ll come back with a translation of the first pic.
Now off to the forest, we´ra having a barbecue with some friends. Sweet sunday!

oh no...

2011-04-15T15:07:00.001+02:00

My son made a drawing of me.
Now what with the choice of magnet on the fridge?! I hope not an omen :)

trigger

2011-04-13T12:35:00.001+02:00

Many pieces of pieces in progress.

crown

2011-04-12T12:44:00.001+02:00

At home in the studio.

crown of a root

2011-04-12T12:39:00.002+02:00

Crown of a tree or a root system.
Same same but different.
Vice versa
and wholly.

anyway a detail from a work in progress.

m i r r o r

2011-04-09T09:07:00.004+02:00

duplicate
KÄRLEK LOVE

Love Your self
and it will be easier for me,
thank You.

mirror

2011-04-09T08:48:00.005+02:00

Drawing challenge: mirror. Ain't that an interesting choice?! Visit the clever Ariane for more mirroring!
In my mirror the word KÄRLEK = LOVE
Quadrupled
Love Love Love Love

and it's increasing
endlessly
LOVE!

(hey, Jasmins mirror reminded me of this)

priority

2011-04-07T15:40:00.001+02:00

The symbolic value of economy is higher than the economical value of symbolism.

How come then that economy has a higher status than symbolism? It should be the other way around.

meditate

2011-04-04T12:27:00.002+02:00

Backåkra in my heart.
A stone cirkle for meditation out in the fields in honor of Dag Hammarskjöld. A man who was devoted to Life and Peace.
Here and here and here and here some more pics from our visits to these fields.

the self

2011-04-04T12:23:00.002+02:00

So I say to my kids go in to freedom now before we go home.
Because in the city there is not much space to be free. As we all know in freedom there is much space to be me. In freedom You can find Your self.

He stands like this for hours.

free

2011-04-04T12:11:00.002+02:00

The four of us walk in to this piece of Nature together and again all by our selves.
In this extraordinary still life of movement we are allowed to be introvert.

breath

2011-04-04T12:03:00.004+02:00

To reach this spot in the south of Sweden. Breathtaking!
We meet only a few other people that found their way this chill day but loads of birds coming in from south-west making formations in the sky line.

Gosh! The Light here is Light!

forest

2011-04-04T11:59:00.001+02:00

Biking on these gentle roads in the heart of a fairy forest.

hike

2011-04-04T11:57:00.002+02:00

We took the kiddos the dinos and the bikes for a weekend in the wilderness.

tail

2011-04-01T16:25:00.002+02:00

A tail as a braid as a tail.

Drawing challenge at sweet Jasmin with tail. Please visit!
and tail if You want!

eyes wide open

2011-04-01T11:18:00.001+02:00

Looking at different ways of things to see. Looking at things differently. Looking at different things. Looking different while looking at things. Looking in to looking out. Look out for a good looking way of things to look in to.

snowdrop

2011-03-31T16:53:00.001+02:00

Splendid precious perfect tiny piece of Nature. Just like You and me.

the river

2011-03-30T13:17:00.000+02:00

Jag flyter på Kristus, floden.
Det lergula gyllene vattnet.
Jag knäpper mina händer ovanför mitt huvud.
Armarna formas till ett öga, ansiktet dess pupill.
Ur djupet av mina anletsdrag minns jag
resans fasta punkt;
rörelsen.

I float on Christ, the river.
The ochre golden water.
I fold my hands above my head.
Arms in the shape of an eye, face as a pupil.
From the depth of my features, remembrance
the secure spot of the journey;
the movement.

super studio

2011-03-29T19:52:00.002+02:00

KKV-Textitryck i Malmö!
Here I work with my major works, screen printing on these huge printing tables. The studio is fully equipped. KKV-Textiltryck (textile-printing) is a workshop studio, a non-profit association of artists working with print and dye on fabric. It´s a great place not least to exchange experiences and chat with colleagues.
The work on the table belongs to Margareta Heijkenskjöld Holmgren

blossom

2011-03-26T09:23:00.002+01:00

Drawing challenge, blossom. My son accompanies us today, he is five.
He hurt his foot this week and has been with me in the studio. Inspiring for both him and me. I'll show You some more results later. I think I have a plan.
For more inspiration welcome to visit his blog. Not very updated as there are many interests in the life of a five-year old :)
Now have a nice weekend and go to the lovely Stephanie for more blossom!

say A

2011-03-24T17:08:00.001+01:00

2011-03-24T17:01:00.003+01:00

this star
this star is shining
this star is shining on line.

and A
A is shouting
A is shouting from this glittery womb of mine.

I'm on to these sherds of stars now
they're tumbling all around
lining up from inside
waiting for A time to shine.

an A

2011-03-21T11:29:00.000+01:00

Nadine chose a letter from the alphabet for drawing challenge and I dared the opportunity to translate a story that I´m working on. I guess it´s still in progress but I´ll tell You the essence of this story. It goes:

Do You need to know the alphabet first, before You can read?
If You don´t know that there are books then maybe You don´t know there´s a thing called reading.
Don´t you need to know the knowledge about reading before You can understand that there are letters that can form words, that can frame sentences, that build stories that roots in history.
So You must know history before You know the alphabet?
But how to read history when You don´t know about characters from the alphabet?
And to decipher them in to meaning.

So what then if You find an A.
You could think it´s a sherd of a star.

Well, it might just be the fragment of a star that someone used as an A to frame sentences to tell their story.

letter

2011-03-19T13:13:00.002+01:00

Today on drawing challenge: a letter from the alphabet.
My letter is A and it goes with a story. I have no time to tell You the story today. Have patience.

love

2011-03-15T13:14:00.001+01:00

Holding hands in the shadow.

bird

2011-03-12T11:01:00.001+01:00

Drawing challenge today at Textilspanieln.
Bird.
I'm sketching for a huge piece. I'm planning for about four meter fabric.

Lay all Your own symbols in the name of bird.

This piece for me includes Rebirth, ashes , faith.
Today my thoughts are in Japan and deep in the pacific ocean.
Love to You all.

light

2011-03-07T21:53:00.001+01:00

Happening in the apartment.
I wish for more
light.

perspective

2011-03-03T15:36:00.002+01:00

I'm working on it.
I'm working hard.
By the way, I have new glasses they bring me new visions again.
Thank You.
I love perspective, working hard, new visions and my new goggles (googles).
Looking good!

The embroidery "TILLIT" / TRUST is made by Elisabeth, one of my mental table-tennis players in the name of trust!

8

2011-03-03T14:38:00.001+01:00

This wheel is now flying.
Eternity within.

wheel of fortune

2011-02-25T12:47:00.003+01:00

2011-02-25T12:47:00.001+01:00

Looking for Eternity, and guess what? I found some. In a braid, in a wheel, in a cycle. In a paper cord and in my hands.

2011-02-19T09:49:00.001+01:00

patchwork

2011-02-19T09:42:00.003+01:00

Drawing challenge today, patchwork.
I inspired by this challenge to sit by the bed of a dead butterfly.
Visit Helen at objects of whimsy for more inspiration!

circle

2011-02-17T10:08:00.000+01:00

I´m trying to be in the circle of Trust.

cottage love

2011-02-16T11:19:00.000+01:00

For some time ago I promised Gina to show my drawings of our allotment garden cottage.
We had a tiny "faluröd" / swedish red cottage on our little allotment ground before and it was falling to pieces. So we decided to build a new one. I saved the door and the two windows with glazing bars. The cottage is the same size plus 1 meter wider for a garden tool store with entrance from a dubbel door on the right. On the left of the door we bought two old windows to have a glass corner, it´s helpful when pre-germinating and also a wonderful wiev out in the garden (thanks Per for the idea). The width of the only room inside is exactly the length of a bed. Perfect for relaxing and to bring a cup of tea. The garden is about 20 meters from our appartment just across the street and then a path in to the allotment area.
It would have been a hard time for me to manage life in an appartment without this garden. (I´m really a forest kind of a person.)
We painted the house with falu black paint. The windows and frames are sun-yellow and gold-ocher linseed oil paint.
Here some pics from the inside. My husbands pics from the allotment garden.

I´m so happy that we conducted this life-affirming project!
A huge Thank You, to the ones involved!

like a bird

2011-02-15T14:28:00.001+01:00

Nina Simone is keeping me company. I'm drawing birds and symbolic cages. These are on their way to a wall in a staircase.

clock wise

2011-02-15T10:25:00.002+01:00

I ask myself, where did time go?
Strange question, as time is not existing and not capable to hide.

little helper

2011-02-13T12:52:00.001+01:00

in the studio this morning.
Outside sunshine.

sky

2011-02-12T10:37:00.003+01:00

Today
blue sky above
and inside insight
I'm in the drawing challenge
today sky.
Visit Helen to see who else has a scenery of sky.
My drawing is a detail from a work in progress.

continue

2011-02-10T16:32:00.000+01:00

Life continues
every heartbeat
every drop of rain
every now and then
all included
everything
every
thing
anything can sing.

moonlight

2011-02-05T11:20:00.002+01:00

The moon
a segment of an orange.

again

2011-02-04T11:01:00.003+01:00

A new try, I'm sorry about this but I want it to work.
I´m trying to blog from my iphone on the app BlogWriter. I guess this is how small the photo gets. I´m not all happy about the layout but I guess it´s ok for now. For example I don´t think You can change colour on the text or work with the design. If anyone knows a better way or another app please let me know, thanks.

You see

2011-02-03T11:40:00.001+01:00

Remember this piece?
It surprised me.
This piece had a story to tell and I had no idea what it was.
Not when made years ago and not when remade some months ago.
Can You see it? Can You see the message?
It says:
You get more than You see.

It´s about all the invisible, the magic, the unpredictable.
It´s about all the in betweens, the face to face and all the layers.
It´s about the white and everything that fits in to it.

and also it has some mathematical indestructible moments of truth that I haven´t yet figured out with all of my sences.

angle

2011-01-26T11:03:00.001+01:00

reflect
reflect and
change
change angle.

the
the way
the way I
the way I see
the way I see things
Everything has different angles
Everything is three dimensional at the least.
Everything is not always what it seems

when I look at You
when I look at You I see You and
maybe I don´t see what You see
in Your mirror mirror...
change angle

I see You and
I see Your layers
don´t be afraid
You are beautiful.

weekword: recycling

2011-01-14T13:01:00.004+01:00

Oh my, I have so many takes on this weekword.
Elisabeth, host for one of my favorite places Textilspanieln, choose Recycling.
When starting to think about it my whole life is a recycle.
Such a beautiful word Recycle.

I do it all the time.
I recycle bottles, crap, plastics, glas, paper, metal.
I recycle leftovers in our compost. (I love the compost)
I recycle seeds from flowers and words from books.
I recycle the childrens clothes, recieve from older and give away to younger.
I recycle my art.
I recycle traditions.
I recycle my thoughts, my memories, my love.
I recycle knowledge, recieve from older and give away to younger.
I recycle compation, light, energy.
I recycle the way I move, dance, love.
I recycle the way of being as a human being.
I recycle my craft, my voice, my head.
I recycle the way I tease.
I recycle my humour, my fears, my tears, my sorrow.
I recycle my smile, yet every smile is new.
I recycle the choice I have of doing good in every second.
I recycle the colour of wisdom, the air I breath, the strength of my muscles and my recipes.
I recycle the cycle of Time and the cycle of Life.

I am a cycle in the cycle of God and so are We.
Please recycle me.

siblings

2011-01-08T22:26:00.001+01:00

She says:

"When my elder brother was in your belly I was on the other side waiting. When I was in your belly he was on this side waiting."

She, my two and a half year old daughter.

weekword: simplicity

2011-01-07T14:35:00.001+01:00

Well Happy New Year You All!

to start the new year here Christine invited me for weekword, I couldn´t resist.
But I feel as I have nothing to say. I´m simply still waiting for the words to gain. It could also be the feeling of having too much to say, as if the words are in a hive. Unable to be captured. The paradox of talking perhaps?

Still in my mind I believe that important words are paradoxes, always interesting. As in the word Simplicity everything holds that is not simple, not light, not easy. And if You can grab hold to those paradoxes in a simple way You gain, You gain Simplicity to hard stuff and that might be the bonus win of this word. Does it make any sense?
I hope You hear me, it´s like my voice is really tiny.

All Good and Peace now in 2011. Simplicity to You my fellow beings.

winter

2010-12-23T13:33:00.001+01:00

Dear friends, It´s like I´m in hibernation. The flue goes around in circles in the house, and the few meters that separates me from my studio requires many more steps than Kebnekajse. I´m giving my hope for next year and I wish this unelected and therefore a bit stressful contemplation will come to its end with new fresh spirit in return. The one that includes my studio that´s been under renovation.

And for this contemplation that includes holidays and family tradition, I hope You all are well.

I´m with You even if I leave no trace.

I wish You sweet Love and Light for Christmas!

i dammen / in the pond

2010-11-26T12:09:00.000+01:00

Fånga Ljuset Narcissus.

Seize the Light Narcissus.

TILLIT

2010-11-23T15:17:00.000+01:00

bun

2010-11-19T15:35:00.001+01:00

The first snow disappears before it has a chance to lay down and rest.

It gives us a chance to lay down and rest.

So we´ll cosy up inside today, and maybe have some cardamom buns!

Have a lovely weekend You all!

studio again

2010-11-18T12:34:00.001+01:00

Får flytta in i min studio igen. Renoveringen som skulle ta tre veckor resulterade i åtta veckor. Avloppsrör och el har bytts ut, invändigt. Min paus förlängdes. Nu står den där tom och inväntar mig. Tom som om ingenting hänt. Byggdamm som smugit sig in överallt är i princip den enda skillnaden.
Kan det vara så att samma renovering även hänt med mig? Åtta veckors paus i konkret arbete ger utrymme för åtta veckors disciplinerad analys. Jag tar tillfället i akt. Varje tillfälle är ett tillfälle för reflektion. Avloppsrör och el har bytts ut, invändigt. Även jag är förändrad utan att det syns.
Det återstår att se vad tomrummet har givit.

Jag har flyttat in två stolar och ett bord. Mittemot varandra står stolarna som i konversation. dialog. samtal. Jag sitter på den ena stolen och jag sitter på den andra.
Konversation. Dialog. Samtal.

Låt oss tala med varandra.

I´m back in my studio again. The renovation where set to three weeks, now eight weeks later they are ready. Drain pipes and power lines has been replaced. My pause extended. Now the studio is empty and waiting for me. Empty as if nothing ever happend. Construction dust the only proof.
Can it be that the same renovation happend to me as well? Eight weeks of time-out in physical work makes space for eight weeks of mental work. I´ll take the challenge. Every opportunity is an opportunity for reflection. Drain pipes and power lines has been replaced. I´m changed as well, though it seems as if nothing ever happend.
It remains to be seen what this void has given.

I´ve moved in with two chairs now. Two chairs opposite each other and a table in between. Two chairs in a conversation. dialogue. discourse. I´m sitting on one chair and I´m sitting on the other.
Conversation. Dialogue. Discourse.

Let us talk.

broderad tillit / embroidered trust

2010-11-18T11:29:00.001+01:00

alldelles sprudlande glad när jag överraskande fick tillit med posten!

Tack Elisabeth!!! Precis vad jag behövde.

Mer tillit till folket!

foto och broderi av Elisabeth - Textilspanieln.

all cheerfull when trust surprisingly came to me by snail mail!

Thank You Elisabeth!!! Just what I needed.

More trust to the people!

photo and embroidery by Elisabeth - Textilspanieln.

att få ge / to get to give

2010-11-12T13:25:00.001+01:00

Att ge för att ge eller att ge för att få

vi behöver nog tänka på det

därför att ge för att få är inte att få men

att ge för att ge är att få.

To give to give or to give to get

we need to think about that

´cause to give to get isn´t to get but

to give to give is to get.

honey

2010-11-12T12:59:00.000+01:00

A cup of warm milk and honey is a cup of kindness.

pic by husband

längs med vägen II / along the road II

2010-11-09T21:39:00.004+01:00

Döden bor Ingenstans. Hon Han Den har inget hus, inget tält, ingen koja. Döden hukar inte undan Regn, skyler sig inte från Sol och Vind dansar hennes hans dens anletsdrag.
Hon Han Den är ett med naturen tänker jag och det spritter till i min kropp för bilden känns självklar.
Jag ÄR Natur säger Döden,
det är det vi har gemensamt.
Såklart. Jag är också Natur och med ens är vi två ett med träden längs med vägen.

Death lives Nowhere. She He It has no house, no tent, no hut. Death does not crouch under Rain, does not veil from Sun and Wind dances hers his its lineament.
It comes to my mind that She He It is one with nature and my body shivers as the picture seems so clear.
I AM Nature Death says,
this is what we have in common.
Of course. I too am Nature and at once the two of us are one with the trees along the road.

translation

2010-11-09T15:44:00.001+01:00

I´ve translated the story "Längs med vägen" You can read it here: "along the road"
Please don´t hesitate to tell me if there´s something not quite right in my English language, as it is not my mother tongue. Also if there is something You need to ask about or just want to say. I´m eager about Your comments.
If You´re a quiet reader You are truly welcome as well!

Have a nice rainy day, as mine is... I´m off on the bike now.

language

2010-11-08T17:15:00.000+01:00

Suddenly I started to write in a different way. The story I´m on is visual, like a movie slowly showing it´s way, playing just in the edge of my eye. In other times it´s the text that is visual, and at those times I often write in English and translates in to Swedish. I see the words and it´s more mathematical, transcendental and in a poetic sence transforming my everyday life.

It´s very exiting now, I´m curious about continuing this story as it is the story that leads the way.

ThankYou Gina and Aimee for making me want to translate this particular story, though it´s a tricky one. I´m on my way...

and Sara You are so sweet.

I´m in the presence right now, enjoying.

facing my fears and enjoying as I know it must lead a good way.

längs med vägen / along the road

2010-11-05T13:16:00.006+01:00

Vad är Ditt förslag Döden?
Hur ska vi gå vidare med Livet från och med nu?

Jag ser en stenmur. Döden sitter där ledigt klädd och sparkar med sin gympasko i gruset. Hon eller Han eller Den skelar något. Ögonen sitter brett isär och blicken går både framåt och åt sidan. Huden är slät. Hon Han Den är så behaglig att se på. Den smutsgrå koftan är kraftig, i vadmal? 1600-tal. Skorna är direkt tagna från nu. Nu som i 2010.
Jag frågar Döden vad Hon Han Den gjort sedan vi sågs sist? Under tiden som jag har ordnat med allt det praktiska. Flyttat, gift mig, skaffat barn och hittat hem. Utan att för den delen hittat mitt hem helt. Döden svarar att det finns ingen tid och under tiden har Hon Han Den väntat, kisat mot solen, suttit i regnet och doftat den blöta jorden under skon. Tro inte att jag inte har underhållit mig själv, jag har dessutom spelat schack med Döden säger Döden. Fördrivit tiden här i Tidlösheten. Jag vågar fråga vem som vann.
Det blev oavgjort. Döden vs Döden 0-0.
Jag vet att min Död har några vinster på sin sida när det gäller kampen om mitt liv. Men de vinsterna delar vi lika, Hon Han Den och jag. Jag vet att de vinsterna är lika mycket mina om jag vill och alla vi vet att jag vill Gud och Döden och Jag. Jag måste bara vilja vilja det också. Det ser ut att vara dags för det.
Döden nickar åt vägen. Ska vi gå säger Hon Han Den och kisar mot solen. Jag förbereder mig knyter på mig ett par sköna skor. Jag tänker att jag inte har hunnit städa att allt inte är klart. Men jag vet att jag kommer att följa Döden ty Döden är en del av Livet, vi går sida vid sida längs den grusiga vägen.
Även hästarna har väntat. Inuti. Jag kommer att styra de hästar som skenar framför mig, jag håller redan i dem hårt. Min kapacitet är som skenande hästar och jag styr den med varm och van hand i strama tyglar.
Jag vet att Döden är vid min sida. Min Död viker inte en tum från min väg. Det får inte jag heller göra.
Jag håller mig själv i strama tyglar. Ju stramare tyglar desto större frihet och det är först nu som jag anar det som jag redan vet. Döden ler vid min sida när Hon Han Den känner min tanke.

Jag är Livet.

What is Your proposal Death?
How do we move forward with Life from now on?

I see a stone wall. Death is sitting there casually dressed and kicking the sneaker in the gravel. She He It is squint-eyed. The eyes are wide apart and the gaze is both forward and lateral. The skin is smooth. She He It has a pleasant appearence. The drab cardigan is in dull frieze. Seventeenth-century. The sneakers are straight from this now. Now as in 2010. I ask Death what She He It has been doing since we last met. While I´ve arranged all the practical things as moved, married, made kids and come home. Not that I particularly found Home for whole. Death answers that there is no such thing as time and during that time She He It has waited, peered at the sun, sat in the rain, got scent of the wet mud from under the sneaker. Don´t think I haven´t amused myself I´ve played chess with Death says Death, killing time here in Timelessness. I dare to ask who won.
It was a dead heat. Death vs Death 0-0.
I know that my Death has some victories on her his its side when it comes to the battle of my Life. But those victories we share alike, She He It and I. I know that those gains are mine as much if I want them to and we all know that I want them to God and Death and I. I just need to want to want it too. It seems to be the Time.
Death nods toward the road. Shall we go she he it says and peers at the sun. I take a deep breath of preparation and find myself a pair of good shoes. I´m thinking that I didn´t have time to tidy, that everything is not clear. But I know that I will follow Death for Death is part of Life and we walk side by side along the gravel road.
The horses have been waiting as well. Inside. I will guide those runaway horses in front of me, I´m already holding them tight. My capacity is like runaway horses and I guide it with a skilled and gentle hand with a tight rein.
I know that Death is by my side. From my road my Death shall not depart. This I can not do either.
I hold myself in a tight rein. The tighter the rein the bigger the freedom and now is the time when I first scent what I´ve long known. Death smiles by my side when She He It senses my thought.

I am Life.

ljus / candle

2010-10-21T15:05:00.002+02:00

Jag har smugit in i trötthet

i trötthet bor tystnad

en öronbedövande tystnad

en öronbedövande trötthet

en trött tystnad

en bön

jag vet att ljuset vaktar min dröm

en öronbedövande dröm

en drömd tystnad

en tyst dröm.

I´ve sneaked in to tiredness

in tiredness silence lives

a deafening silence

a deafening tiredness

a tired silence

a prayer

I know that candles guard my dream

a deafening dream

a dreamed silence

a silent dream.

Lyssna / Listen to: Melanie Safka with "Candles in the rain".

Can´t but love her!

spirit

2010-10-14T14:11:00.000+02:00

The spirit of a phrase is to be used
use me
says the phrase
to the spirit
and the spirit of the phrase is.

vespa

2010-10-12T13:09:00.000+02:00

Smala gator fordrar små fordon.
och kolla FÄRGKOMBINATIONEN!

Narrow streets claims small vehicles.
and check out that COLOR COMBINATION!

by the way Nina Simone, I bet You need to check her out today.

Roma

2010-10-12T12:52:00.003+02:00

Some more colors of this amazing place...

picnic in the city

2010-10-12T12:43:00.002+02:00

Every day, different grapes, strawberries, cheese and bread. Days in Rome were great.

paus

2010-10-06T22:56:00.000+02:00

Min studio är nerpackad. Det renoveras och byts stammar i huset. Avloppsrör ska plockas ut ur min fina vägg. Först hade jag panik, ingenstans att jobba. Men när väl allt var nermonterat och undanstuvat så spreds ett stort lugn. ingenstans att jobba. en paus. en välbehövd

rakt igenom rakt igenom rakt igenom mig.

Vi har varit i Rom. Några dagar i Rom. Ett trolleri. packa, flyga, förflytta sig. mångfald och förändring

rakt igenom rakt igenom rakt igenom mig.

Dessutom det där med att vara mamma. som man så intensivt går igenom när barnet fyller år. mamma

rakt igenom rakt igenom rakt igenom mig.

My studio is all packed in boxes. It´s to be renovated, the house and drain pipes are taken out of my nice walls. At first I panicked, nowhere to work. But when all was well stowed away, a great calm was spread. nowhere to work. a paus. a well-needed

right through right through right through me.

We´ve been in Rome. A few days in Rome. It´s like magic. to pack, to fly, movement. diversity and change

right through right through right through me.

Besides, the notion about being a mother. that You so intense go through on Your childs birthday. mother

right through right through right through me.

a little special blog

2010-09-27T14:21:00.000+02:00

Min son och jag startade en blogg till honom här om dagen. Välkomna till Ansgars specialblogg!

My son wanted a blog of his own so we started one for him the other day. Please welcome to visit Ansgars special blog!

ukulele and hat

2010-09-23T14:01:00.005+02:00

Isn´t this just the best pic ever? My four-year old son took it, it makes me so happy. It´s one of his best friends with an ukulele and a matching hat.

pink petal again

2010-09-16T10:51:00.009+02:00

I was out in my garden this morning, mourning the Geraniums
the pink petals has turned greyish-orange and
the wind was whispering
about fall and
changeless changes and
falling.

This night I had a dream
when dawn came and aroused me
the dream wouldn´t go away.
The dream still hurts in my body and
fragments of it is whispering
about fall and
changeless changes and
falling.

I am unable
to read the dream as it is a dream
but
I am able
to read the wind as it is a wind.

A wind of fall
dreaming a dream
about falling.

simplicity

2010-09-07T10:06:00.004+02:00

Kökshanddukens enkla skönhet.
The simple beauty of a kitchen towel.

inside the wind

2010-09-01T13:04:00.005+02:00

Sometimes I visualize the wind,
not only do I feel it
or see it´s advance.
I look in to it
I screw up my eyes and this is what I see
I made a sketch,
You might call it the invisible skeleton of the wind.
I´m not sure yet if different winds has different skeletons,
different dna perhaps.
I know though that they have different purposes.
Like the one the other day that blew away old habits.
and
I know that I must do some research inside the wind...

to be continued.